[Milliways]: First Gestures

[smallgayjew]

Posner can't believe that it's actually here. He can't believe he's finally leaving home (with Dakin) and moving out (with Dakin) and starting at Oxford (with Dakin). He's got all his essentials packed into a trunk and a suitcase, and it feels like too little to encompass his life so far, but it also feels appropriate to be starting a new life without any of the encumbrances of the old.

On the platform, he kisses his mum and hugs his dad and shakes his uncle's hand, and he tries not to look at the tears his mum is holding back, and he tries not to let his own fall. It isn't sad, not really. It's only...a bit frightening.

So he kisses his mum once more, and he lets her fix his hair, and he hugs his dad again, and then he takes a deep breath and lugs his trunk and his suitcase and his whole life onto the train and moves to find a seat by the window so he can wave them off they can wave him off.

And he doesn't sing Gracie Fields this time, but he wants to.

Comments

[smallgayjew]

"Yes!" David answers, grinning. "But we shouldn't tell him."

[pushtheboatout]

"Of course not, because then he'll think we're pushing him. He has to feel like it's his idea. We'll have fabulous parties and invite beautiful--virtuous--women, and we'll steer him to the best one."

[smallgayjew]

"I don't think he's looking for virtuous anymore."

[pushtheboatout]

"Adventurous, then?"

[smallgayjew]

"Yes, adventurous might be the way to go."

[pushtheboatout]

"If he's traveling to exotic locales," Stuart muses, "she might have to be willing to go with him. Unless it's too dangerous. I wonder how that works."

[smallgayjew]

"If they're right for each other, they'll work something out."

He finds it much easier to plan for Scripps' happy future than his own.

[pushtheboatout]

"But the point is," says Stuart, "they visit us because they like to be around us. Our house is comfortable to them."

[smallgayjew]

"Yes," David says quietly.

[pushtheboatout]

"Because it's a happy house."

[smallgayjew]

"Perhaps," David says, frowning a bit.

[pushtheboatout]

"What?" says Stuart, frowning too.

[smallgayjew]

"I think people put too much emphasis on always being happy. I don't know that it's the adjective I want on my house."

[pushtheboatout]

"What adjective would you prefer?"

[smallgayjew]

"I don't know. I think perhaps we should wait and see what sort of house it is."

[pushtheboatout]

"The kind of house it is doesn't matter. What matters is what happens inside."

[smallgayjew]

"I know. That's what I mean."

[pushtheboatout]

"Then what do you mean, what sort of house? It'll be our house. It'll be a good place."

[smallgayjew]

"I'm sure it will be," David says carefully. "I just...don't like the expectation that it need always be happy."

[pushtheboatout]

"I'd rather we didn't scream at each other all the time."

[smallgayjew]

"And you think those are the only two options?"

[pushtheboatout]

"No," says Stuart. "There's also tense silences, boredom, falling into a rut, quiet contementment..."

[smallgayjew]

"Exactly. So...I'd like to allow for the options."

[pushtheboatout]

"How about this," says Stuart. "It's a normal house."

[smallgayjew]

"I can...work with that."