[Milliways]: No Place Like Home

[smallgayjew]

The attitude when they climb back into the van is much more subdued. Posner settles into the back seat. He wants to ask how the others think they did. He wants to know if they feel as odd about the whole experience as he does.

He wants to know that they will all still be together come autumn.

Comments

[smallgayjew]

Posner laughs softly. "Of course you do."

[pushtheboatout]

Dain arches an eyebrow at him. "It's not a struggle."

[smallgayjew]

"No, I don't imagine it is."

He has full confidence in Dakin's ability to be happy absolutely anywhere.

[pushtheboatout]

Dain says in a lower voice, "It doesn't have to be a struggle."

[smallgayjew]

Posner's voice is just as low when he responds, "Not for you, it doesn't."

[pushtheboatout]

"Nor for you. Not if you don't want it to be."

[smallgayjew]

"It's not as simple as wanting."

Wanting is something he knows how to do.

(And he's not sure sometimes if he actually does want to be happy.)

[pushtheboatout]

"Then what do you think it takes?"

Scripps is watching them with that odd expression again, a bit like they're a tennis match.

[smallgayjew]

"I don't know. Something more, clearly."

He doesn't often talk about not being happy. Not to Dakin, certainly.

[pushtheboatout]

"I know exactly what I want," Dakin says and counts it off on his fingers. "I want to never worry about money. I want to pull whenever I want. I want a respectable house in a good city. I want to keep reading, keep writing, and go to Paris a few times a year to keep my French up.

"If that doesn't make me happy, I don't know what will."

[smallgayjew]

"And what if you don't get that?"

Posner knows exactly what he wants too. It's just not entirely up to him whether he gets it.

[pushtheboatout]

"I'll keep working until I do."

[smallgayjew]

"What if you never do?"

[pushtheboatout]

Dakin gives him a withering look.

"I will," he says simply, and to himself, "And I won't have to lie about it."

[smallgayjew]

David frowns, not sure what Dakin means by that.

"I'm sure you will."

[pushtheboatout]

"You just have to want it enough."

[smallgayjew]

"Not everyone is you, Dakin."

[pushtheboatout]

Dakin rolls his eyes.

"More people ought to follow my example, then."

[smallgayjew]

Posner rolls his eyes as well. "Not everyone wants to be you."

[pushtheboatout]

"I can't imagine why."

[smallgayjew]

"Which is your charm and your repulsion both."

[pushtheboatout]

Dakin barks a laugh.

"I do love it when you show your teeth, Pos."

[smallgayjew]

Posner smiles, blushing. It's rare that he does with anyone, but especially with Dakin.

[pushtheboatout]

Dakin looks out the window, smiling too.